You have questions?

We have answers!

When do you go get her? We leave for Beijing Friday, April 16th. We'll probably meet Ariel in Guangzhou on April 19th! Our agency (America World) arranges appointments for our travel group with the Chinese and US governments.

How old is she now? 7.5 months

Heard anything? Any updates? Any new photos? If so, we will tell you on the blog. We did send a care package to her through Ann at Red Thread. Ann is well-connected and can sometimes get updated photos and measurements, but there is no guarantee. She said she asked twice and the orphanage (Maoming Maogang) said no. Please keep in mind that some of the info regarding Ariel's adoption and circumstances is private. We have waited a long time. Please let us enjoy.

Why does it take so long? Families (I-600 pre-Hague) usually wait 7-9 weeks from referral to travel. We send back an acceptance document, which our agency sends to China. China eventually issues us a Travel Approval (TA.) Our agency can use that to set up our appointments at our child's provincial capital (Guangzhou, in our case), and at the US Consulate in Guangzhou. Compared to the 4.5 years since we started the adoption, a few weeks is nothing.

Why do you have to stay there so long? We'll be in China about 2 weeks, and that's fine with us! First we'll meet our travel group (other families with America World) in Beijing for a weekend of sightseeing. Then we'll travel to Guangzhou in southeast China. There we'll meet her! We'll also meet with the Civil Affairs office in her provincial capital for an interview and some of her adoption documents. Later, we'll have business at the US Consulate in Guangzhou. She'll leave China with her Chinese passport, an Immediate Relative (IR-3) Visa to enter the US, her Chinese birth certificate, adoption decree, etc. It takes a while to do everything necessary to get these documents. Plus, we'll have some time for local sightseeing, shopping, free time, and getting to know our baby.

Do you have to stay there so they can see how you're bonding? No. We stay so long so we can take care of all the legalities. And those are very important (to China, to the US, and to us and Ariel's future as a US citizen.) It's nice that China assumes we will bond.

Do you go to her orphanage to get her? No, she'll probably travel by bus (maybe 6 hours?) with some orphanage workers to Guangzhou, China. They'll probably bring her to our hotel, but we might meet her in another building.

Try to go to her orphanage. We will ask. However, it's about 6 hours away from Guangzhou. I think we'll be the only family in our group with a child from that orphanage. So I doubt our agency guides would be willing to arrange a trip. The orphanage is likely closed to visitors/foreigners, but we will ask. If we went, we'd probably be on our own or with a privately-hired bilingual guide. I am thinking this trip will be stressful enough without trekking to Maoming. Believe me, traveling from point A to point B in China can be very, very stressful and risky (I found some of the driving terrifying last time I was there; trains are better, but even navigating the train stations can be tough - it's not like the US, Europe, or Japan.) However, I understand visiting her orphanage could ease her transition - seeing her caretakers & friends one more time (but I've also heard it can have the opposite effect.) By the way, there are about 6 orphanages in Maoming. Maogang is one of the smallest (about 20 children.)

Are you changing her name? I like to think of it as adding a name. We'll keep her Chinese given name (Hao Liang) as her middle name. We'll give her the first name Ariel. She will always have her full Chinese name, even if it's not on her American documents. So her full name will be Ariel Hao Liang Parks. Yes, the middle name is two separate words (don't worry, lots of people have two middle names with no problem.)

What's her Chinese name? Gang Hao Liang. Gang is the "last name" and other children in her orphanage were given the same last name. It comes from her orphanage name (Maogang district of Maoming city.) Hao Liang means "good pretty" or "very pretty." When we meet her, we'll ask her caretakers if they call her any nicknames.

How do you pronounce it? In English phonetics, it sounds like "Gahng How Lee-ahng" with very soft g's on the end. For my Japanese friends, the romaji is: gan hao rian.
I'll try to assign the Mandarin tones later.

She doesn't look Chinese. Last I checked, Chinese people have a wide variety of looks. Just like people in your country. We've seen lots of referral photos over the years, so we know they come in all varieties of cute.

Is anyone throwing you a baby shower? Dear friend & neighbor Angela B. is spearheading that project. We're thinking sometime in June (after Ariel is safely home.) We are lucky to have such nice friends here who can't wait to meet the little cherub.

What do you need? We have most everything. We've had lots of time to acquire things. Friends & family have been thoughtful with gifts and hand-me-downs. She could use some bath toys and other toys for a young baby (she's 7 months old now.) We listed some childproofing items and special books on her Amazon registry.

Why are you going to Hawaii? Are you going straight there? Yes, we're going straight to Honolulu (for about a week) after Guangzhou. She can enter the US with her IR-3 visa and Chinese passport. In Hawaii, we'll file her N600-K (for naturalization as a US citizen.) We'll get her Certificate of Citizenship (CoC), US passport, and social security number there. For military families, there's a way to do this all from Japan, but I think it's a long and convoluted process. We'd rather go through Hawaii, which is used to dealing with US expats & military in Asia. Our friends just did this in Hawaii for their daughter, and it went very smoothly for them. Plus, a Hawaii "vacation" will be nice!

(What I wish people would ask) What will you need as soon as you arrive home? Happy cats and a tidy house. Our trusty cat-sitter, Sam, will take care of this (he'll be bunkin' with the cats while we're gone.) Also, someone to meet us at the airport with Ariel's car seat, and some water & snacks. I've already suckered some friends into this favor. We also need friends to understand that Jeff & I will be the primary holders & feeders of Ariel for a while. This is important for bonding, but we'll see how she does.

How much does she weigh? We don't know how much she weighs now (at 7.5 months - she was born August 15, 2009.) If her medical report is accurate (kind of hard to interpret), at 5.5 months, she weighed 4.8 kg (about 11 pounds.) At about 7 days, she was 2.8 kg (6.2 pounds.) Her smallness is typical for southern Chinese girls. We guess she'll be in 6-9 month clothes (possibly some 0-6 month) and Japanese size 70-80.

Do you think you'll adopt again? This is pretty personal. Just let us enjoy the here and now. If your name is "Aunt Sandie" then you can ask a question like this.

What if you get there and they offer you another (additional) child? This just doesn't happen in China adoption.

Have you lined up childcare? No. At some point, we'll find a trustworthy babysitter. But for now, just remember: we have waited 4.5 years.

Are you going to tell her she was adopted? (I can't believe somebody really asked me this.) It will be part of our talk from the very beginning. We have lots of tools and guidance on how to help her understand and explore it as she grows.

How do you feel about a million questions? To be frank, sometimes they get on my nerves. I know people just want to show kind interest, but other times they just want to satisfy their curiosity or make a point without regard for our feelings. Remember, we've probably been asked the same questions 500 times. A barrage of questions is not the way to my heart. A few questions asked tactfully and in private are fine. Once we have our child, I will appreciate even more tact and restraint when asking questions (in her presence, even if you think she can't understand.) If you are seriously looking into adopting yourself, then I'd be happy to talk with you about it in private. Some nice questions are: How did you choose her name? What drew you to China? What are her interests? How does she interact with the cats? Do you think you'll visit China with her someday?

Will you host this event / coordinate this function / work the spring bazaar / serve on the OSC board next year / volunteer at this event? Ask me 8-12 months from now. Don't waste your energy even asking now.

Are you taking her back to the US right away to show family? We'd like to spend time at our home (in Japan) relaxing, getting to know her, and establishing a routine. So we don't know when we'd take her back to the US (it's a long flight from Tokyo), but not right away. I don't even want to make any plans now - just have some solid time to establish her new home.